Merry Fucking Christmas!

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Damn! It has been a rocky year. It started out great, for me anyway, and then it just got shittier until the end. I think this happens every Election Year for any country.

Anyway, I’m gonna keep this short. I hope that you guys had a better year than I had. Check your New Years Resolutions and see if you managed to keep some of those promises. I think I managed to keep maybe 5 out of 12…such a slacker this year.

Merry Christmas, Everyone!

Krampusnacht!!

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Honestly, I really wish that we celebrated Krampusnacht in America. What’s not to like about a Satanic Santa?

From my understanding, Krampus is like the hellish opposite of Santa Claus. The nice fat grandpa we know and love rewards good children with toys and treats while putting coal in a naughty child’s stocking. Krampus, on the other hand, is more about scaring kids straight. He prefers to drag asshole kids to Hell. Just note that it’s customary to offer schnapps where Santa likes milk and cookies.

I’ve seen some videos on youtube about past Krampusnacht festivals and it looks like so much fun! One of the things I observed is that this is a family celebrated holiday. We have children hanging out with a goblin-like creature. I can’t see the average yuppie parents approving of this holiday. Their precious snowflake children would piss their pants. Yeah, we have Halloween but I think it’s lost it’s scariness. Is that even a word? Anyway, I’d definitely be that parent who would bring my kid to this as a fun way to introduce them to the amazing world of horror.

Is there anyone here who celebrates Krampusnacht? Are there any cities in America where this is a thing? What do you guys think? Would you take your family to this festival?

“It’s Alive” is Every Parents’ Nightmare

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Written, Produced, and Directed by Larry Cohen

Starring: John P. Ryan and Sharon Farrell

I had the pleasure of catching this on the Turner Classic Movie channel during the Halloween season. I was surprised that day they had a number of Independent Horror movies. The one that caught my attention was “It’s Alive”. I’ve always heard about how this is a must-see movie from the ’70s. I have to say that I wasn’t disappointed!

The movie is centered around the Davis family. They’re that perfect nuclear family with the nauseating cookie cutter life. The future is only brighter now that the Davis family is expecting their second child. When it’s time for Baby #2’s arrival, nothing but chaos follows. Instead of a dimpled bundle of joy, the Davis had a murderous mutant who kills when he feels threatened. The whole city is on lockdown as the police carry out a search and destroy mission while the Davis family has to cope with the fact that their child is a killing machine.

I loved how this movie was basically the nightmare every parent faces when having children. One of the things that were being thrown around throughout the movie were environmental concerns. “Have you been exposed to radiation, Mrs. Davis?” or “Have you taken any new medication, Mrs. Davis?” were the big questions floating around the film. Even though this was filmed in the ’70s, that is something that still a constant fear today. How many of you have seen those commercials saying “If you’ve taken X Medication and your child is suffering from a disability, you may be eligible for compensation”? I’m not going to even touch the medical journals that tell you what’s good for the fetus and what isn’t.

¬†Anyway, 23 yr old Rick Baker was in charge of creating the creepy mutant baby. Before working on this he helped with the make up for The Exorcist. But it was It’s Alive that jump started his career which led to 7 academy awards for Best Make Up. Sometimes all it takes in an indie movie to give you that extra push you needed. Am I right?

But like most Indie movies it wasn’t a box office success. However it did do well in overseas. So later, Cohan asked the studio if it did well in London if they would re-release it. They agreed but didn’t think much of it. Imagine their surprise when it did well in London and it did better in the US after it’s re-release.

Trailer:

“Death Stranding” Adds Our Favorite Cannibal!

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Fannibals Rejoice!! Our favorite cannibal has been added to the video game we’ve all been waiting for!

Death Stranding rose from the ashes of our burnt dreams when it was announced that Silent Hills wasn’t going to happen after all. After numerous tears were shed, we got a surprise when Hideo Kojima announced the game at the Electronic Entertainment Expo 2016. The game will also have Norman Reedus as the main protagonist and director Guillermo del Toro.

Anyway, a new trailer came out with none other than Mads Mikkelsen as the games antagonist. I have no clue what the game is about or who the characters are. All I know is I want to play this game. XBOX gamers be warned! It’s going to be available on Playstation 4.

So who else can’t wait to get their hands on this!