“Alien Tampon”….Really?


Ok…So I was flipping through 9gag.com one day and stumble upon a gif that said “Alien Tampon”. What followed was a number of flashes of a glowing tampon, a girl inserting said tampon, and turning into a mutant monster thing. I thought, “Well that’s weird.” But I didn’t think it was a real thing…until I read the comments.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, Alien Tampon is an actual movie! I haven’t seen it but the trailer was enough for me. Maybe next time Damsel Cannibal and I get together we’ll check it out.

The basic plot is aliens come crashing to earth and the Government takes them out. Enter the mean girl of the school being her usual bitchy self. She drops her tampon in a puddle of the alien’s blood outside a rave and decides to use it. I say again, she uses a glowing neon green tampon! After inserting it, she turns into this alien/zombie/mutant thing that’s terrorizing the world. So it’s up to the rest of the girls to arm themselves and destroy that mutant bitch.

There’s bad CGI, even worse acting, silly plot, and a very questionable use of feminine products. It sounds like it’ll be hysterical! I’m a little grossed out but it sounds like a movie you can enjoy will your buddies when there’s nothing else one TV.