The Moth Diaries (2011)

Director: Mary Harron (female director, whoohoo!) 

Starring: Sarah Bolger, Lily Cole, Sarah Gadon, and Scott Speedman

Let me begin this review with a quote from the movie. Ahem. There are three things in every gothic vampire story:

  • 1. Sex
  • 2. Blood
  • 3. Death

But in this movie there’s a missing element. So I’ll just come out (no pun intended) and write it:

  • 4. Lipstick femmes and implied lesbianism

16yr old Rebecca is a *cough*closeted*cough* student at an all-girl boarding school. She shares a room with Lucy, her “best friend” *cough*girlfriend*cough,* who offers “comfort” in the wake of Rebecca’s father’s suicide. Rebecca makes a habit of joining Lucy in the bathtub and caressing her face (cuz straight girls LOVE sharing intimate bubble baths together.) They even have an “out” token lesbian friend named Charlie who they hang out with, too. Yup.  Everything in Rebecca’s sapphic utopia is cool until a new girl, Ernessa, shows up on campus.

Rebecca becomes troubled *cough*jealous*cough* when Lucy and Ernessa develop an unnatural friendship *cough*havingsex*cough. Mmmhmm there’s a love scene between the two girls. And menses. Mattress. Staining. Menses. I was half-expecting to see gory muff-diving stuff, but thankfully the movie didn’t go there. Rebecca is convinced Ernessa is a vampire. Ernessa walks through glass. She pops up everywhere in Rebecca’s wet dreams. And the girl has a rotten scent and never seems to eat at the cafeteria.

Rebecca goes so far as to burn her rival in a coffin. But you stopped paying attention once I wrote “lesbian love scene” right?  Let’s be honest. We’re here for the thinly veiled girl-on-girl stuff. Yes? OK? Good. I’m not the only one.

“The Moth Diaries” is long, predictable, and maudlin at times. The actress who plays Rebecca isn’t very convincing, and there’s not much horror here, either. What this movie has a lot of are perky femmes, meta gothic theory and…um…yeah. That’s about it. The plot is a hot mess. The ending doesn’t even make sense. But I’m giving it a “C.” I can see where the director meant to go, but there were too many derailments along the way to give this movie the bite it needed (pun intended.) I recommend this movie for folks who enjoy underaged schoolgirl fantasy flicks. And weird closeted lesbianism. Sigh.

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